My take on trust issues

Here’s what I believe: trust issues aren’t flaws.
They don’t come from zodiac signs or personality types—they’re defense mechanisms. They’re what people build after being hurt, after going through childhood trauma, betrayal, abandonment, or neglect. They’re how we try to protect ourselves from getting hurt again.

People with trust issues tend to expect the worst. They overthink. They watch your actions closely, and most times, they can predict your next move. They need constant reassurance—not because they’re clingy or needy, but because their mind is constantly fighting doubt. So, if you’re with someone who asks, “Do you still love me?” often, please don’t feel burdened. Just say you do. It means more than you know.

It’s hard for these people to open up emotionally. They feel like everyone is out to take advantage of them. They believe no one is truly trustworthy—and let’s be honest, the world hasn’t really given them many reasons to think otherwise. Loyalty is rare these days. That’s why some would rather be alone than risk being broken again.

If I’ve been hurt once—twice—I don’t want to go through it a third time. No one likes being shattered. And when the hurt comes from family? That’s a different level of pain. Families are supposed to be your rock, your safety net. But some people are carrying wounds inflicted by the very people who were supposed to love them first. I can’t even begin to imagine the pain some have gone through.

Trust issues are psychological scars. Some heal with time, but many don’t—they just stay with us, shaping how we see the world.

If I’ve been cheated on before—say, by an ex who swore “she’s just a friend” and later ended up with that same “friend”—you can’t expect me to blindly trust you and your female bestie. I’ve lived that story. I’ve heard “You’re just being insecure,” followed by “We’re like siblings,” and then—“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean for it to happen.”
Seriously? You didn’t?

If I’ve come from an abusive home, where my parents fought like enemies and my dad once pointed a gun at my mom in the middle of the night, don’t expect me to believe marriage is all roses. Don’t expect me to be fully convinced you’d never lay a hand on me.
I want to believe you.
I want to trust you.
But the “what ifs” won’t stop.

Truth is, trust issues can be useful. They keep us cautious. But if we let them take full control of our lives, that’s when they become dangerous.
We all need to heal.

Because, believe it or not, there are still good, genuine people out there.
I will love to hear your take on this topic 😌
N/B; the pictures I used belongs to me.