My Family // Our Tradition

8 months ago

Family traditions or annual rituals you participate in. What's special about them for you?

For the best of my years in my hometown, I have lived and interacted more with my maternal family than my paternal family and that's because my paternal family is not interested in us, so, for all the number of years we returned and I have been living in my hometown, I only get to participate in my maternal family traditions and over the years I have gotten accustomed and acquainted with it that I always look forward to the tradition.

Well, it is mostly done during the festive period, during this period everyone, especially from my maternal family is expected to travel back to the village. It is mandatory and over time has become a tradition that all family members are expected to be in the village on or before December 31st since my maternal parents don't make a big deal about December 25th nor do they celebrate it.

My maternal grandfather married two wives and we all know that it is quite rare to see two different women married to the same man living happily without having issues or conflicts of interest between each other. Most times the issues may arise from their children and extend to their mothers making both wives and children live in war, jealousy, and hatred.

My grandfather is also a chief more like a king (Obong Idung) in my dialect, so since he doesn't celebrate December 25th, he expects us and gives us the liberty of enjoying that day wherever we wish to but he instructs us to always be in the village on or before December 31st, so we all can partake in the family reunion/tradition.

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So, this is what he does, he makes money or foodstuffs available for each wife, their kids, and grandchildren and they are expected to cook, eat, and drink from the same pot whether they are happy or having issues between themselves.

We all eat including my grandfather from the same tray and share in all the drinks after we've all eaten and relaxed, each person, especially his wives and kids, is to open up to him if there are any issues, fights, challenges, or conflicts happening between themselves.

He would listen to everyone, air out their opinions, their annoyance, grievance, or whatever they have in their mind, at the end of listening and making sure everyone has said whatever they need to say and poured out their hearts without holding back, he steps in givers his take, gives them his advice, caution the parties involved.

He then draws them close asks them to talk to each other, and also tells them to forgive each other. When they are all done, and he is done sorting out the whole issue on ground, he gathers us all and prays for everyone, as we begin the new year.

As little and unimportant as that seems, I grew attached and every 31st of December, I always looked forward to traveling to the village because it is one of those days that is always busy and fun in our household and we get to eat whatever we want and get to eat till we are filled to the brim and not asking for anything again. We also get to go out to traditional events together and also accord the respect of being a grandchild to their village head, which tickles my fancy, whenever I witness them.

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