Ladies of Hive Community Contest #171 ~ Dear Woman, Be Intentional and Love Yourself More

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What does Women's Empowerment mean to you and what are some of your personal experiences that motivated you to think/care about women’s empowerment?

In my 20+ years of being a woman living on this planet Earth especially from the country I am from, I have been made to understand that women shoulder heavier responsibilities than we can think of, and the absurd part of this whole thing is our responsibilities are overrated and not openly hyped by many because they look petty to the eyes and most times tagged as an Insignificant responsibilities or role and they are not talked about openly because it is tagged "A Norm or Necessity" but that insignificant role we play is as important and necessary or even much more important and carries a lot of weight than we can ever think of but we are not praised as much as men are praised because it is "A necessity for every woman."

Don't get me wrong, I am not neglecting the role or responsibility of a man but I am saying the role a woman plays is more weightier than we can imagine. To her society, to her community, to her nuclear and extended family, and also to her husband and children and the cycle continues.

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If she is not taking care of her parents, she is taking care of her siblings, and then down to her husband and her children, and at the end of the day, we likely forgo ourselves and our dreams and begin living for these people because of course society has made us believe that it is our "Duty, role or responsibility" to live serving these people.

That is why in today's century, if any woman as much as thinks outside society's norm or box, she is tagged as a Rebel, irresponsible, and a lot more hurtful and negative harsh words that we can think of.

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We all grew up hearing words like "As a woman, you are not expected to do this, you are not expected to do that or dress that way or walk that way or even smile that way" and "As a woman you are expected to do this and do that so that you will be loved, admired, and married." This and many more caged us and kept us in the status quo

Society defines our lives, and as a responsible lady or woman whose life revolves around these people, we are expected to do this thing, so that we will gain favour in the sight of society, church, community, parents, siblings, and even men, as per suitors that will agree to do us a favour by marrying us and so here we are living our lives for these people just so that we can be accepted in the society.

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I have come to realize that one precious gift, an inherent gift that was given to every woman is the "Power of a woman" Unfortunately not many of us have realized how much power we have to either make or mar whatever we choose to because society has tagged us "Weak Vessels" and oh, we are meant to be Submissive, and Dedicated to these people all our lives because our lives revolve around them and without them we are incomplete.

Society has made many women feel that without marriage and bearing children, they aren't complete, and can not achieve what they aim to achieve because marriage and childbearing are what a woman is supposed to live all her life doing and not chasing her dreams and career because her place is in "Her husband's house" "In the kitchen", "On the bed satisfying her husband's sexual urge", and " In childbearing" I am not saying there is anything bad in having that the truth is there is more to "Being a woman" in a world were a lady has to constantly prove herself and her worth to the society that she is capable of doing something outside what the society defined what her place is supposed to be.

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From my point of view and personal experience, I would say Women's Empowerment means letting every woman know and come to the knowledge of their sense of self-worth, and knowing that they can determine their own choices and choose what they want because of the benefit they would get, and most times they could decide to be self-centered if it means that they don't have to get hurt and having a right to influence civil change for themselves and others as much as they want without worry about what the society thinks or defines their lives or what people would say if they don't do the regular.

Truth be told, because a particular thing is done a certain way doesn't mean it is right and that everyone should do it especially when it is beneficial only to a certain person or people.

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In my years of experience, I have grown to decide or choose what I want for myself and I am sure that whatever choice I make, I am going to fully benefit from what comes out of it and take responsibility for whatever also comes out of it and not care about what the society says or thinks because society is never always there to walk me out of the choice when it gets challenging and tough even when I made such choice as a result If the pressure mounted on me and their definition of what a woman is meant or supposed to be.

After being faced with the pressure of marrying at a very young age just because of family challenges, I was meant to be the sacrificial lamb just to save my family but all thanks to my rebellious and stubborn attitude, I was able to stand my ground and today those who were in support of me getting married, because it was what I was supposed to do to save my family, are all glad I did not fall a victim to "Early marriage" because they later realized that the man wasn't who he claimed to be.

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And I asked myself and all of them involved, what if I had allowed the pressure get to me and married because of the help he could give my family, what would have been of me in that marriage, what would have been of my young life, a seventeen-year-old girl asked to sacrifice her promising life for family sake.

These and more are what women go through, just because we were born women, so as a woman, when it comes to your heart and your emotional health, never be in a rush. Be very intentional about whose hands you place the delicate parts of you. It is either you are doing that or you are taking each day to fall deeper and deeper in love with yourself, because trust me, you are better off alone.

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This is my entry to Ladies of Hive Community Contest #171

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