My Father's Answer Shook Me - Short Story

I remember it like it was yesterday.

It was a hot Central California day. My dad and myself were in our shop building doing some work on one of our many pieces of farm equipment. I don't remember exactly what we were working on but I do remember he was at our work bench trying to disassemble a part or some kind.

I don't know if it was the heat from the weather or this particular job was taking a frustratingly long time to complete, but I was in a pretty shitty mood. I was 19 years old and had been out of school for almost a year. I had moved away from home right after graduation and basically failed at making it on my own and had moved back in with my folks. Luckily my family had a farm and there was always something to do. We weren't the biggest farmers in the world, but we made enough to have a decent life. So my parents welcomed me back home and put my ass straight to work.

At this point I was pretty bitter and defeated. I went out on my own and fell flat on my face. It wasn't a good feeling having to come back home. I saw my peers making it , yet here I sit, in a hot ass barn wrenching on some dirty piece of broken down equipment wondering what in the hell went wrong? And honestly at that point I really didn't have a clue WHY I failed. That was the thing, I thought I knew what to do to make it. But obviously I didn't

So here I am, with my dad working in the shop. So I start bitching and moaning. I'm complaining about how I am pissed off at life, and all the things I want and how I want them right now. Just being a total ass. I cringe as I think back about this moment. My poor father.

So after about 15 minutes of my complaining, my dad, who this whole time was at the work bench just plugging away at this part, just stopped. He was hunched over the part then straightened right up and dropped the wrench he had in his hand straight to the floor. Boy when he did that I shut the hell up right there. And what he said literally shook me right out of my bad attitude.

He turned around and looked right at me. He wasn't mad, his facial expression was very neutral, very matter of fact. And in a normal speaking voice he said " You say you want to do and have all these things? Well son, let me ask you this....How bad do you want it?"

I didn't have an answer. It's like my brain just broke right there on the spot. And honestly I didn't know the answer to his question. I was just blabbering on about all the things I wanted. Forget about how I was going to accomplish all these things.

Then my dad said "Son, do you see all of this here? And do you notice all the things that I know about?" So I answered him "Ugh.....yes?" Then he followed with " All this stuff I have accomplish, I didn't know when I started. I had to find out, on my own. I knew I wanted to farm and eventually own our own land, but I needed to find out how. And do you know how we have investments? I had to figure all of that stuff out."

He kept going "I knew this is what I wanted, but I didn't know how to get it. So I started asking people I knew, questions. Once I got answers to my questions, I had more questions. So I went to the library and book stores. I got books on everything I needed to know about to get me to where we are at now. Ask your mom how many times I stayed up late reading books or magazine articles about various subjects. Books and magazines about pest control, weed management, irrigation techniques, investing, money management, auto/tractor repair. I did those things because I wanted this. Now you need to figure out how bad do you want it? Are you willing to do what it takes to figure it out?"

I just stood there and said nothing. But I received his message loud and clear.

Then he went and and picked up his wrench, and went back to working on that part.

That was 33 plus years ago. And to this day I still think about that day in that hot ass shop and what my dad said to me. So much so I'm writing about it right now after all these years.

My dad has been gone for 10 years now and this was one of the greatest things he has ever said to me. And if you have made it to this point of my story, hopefully his words to be can help you or someone that needs to hear it.

Thanks Dad.