26 april 2025, @mariannewest's Freewrite Writing Prompt Day 2718: entertain the rabbit
“See, this is why I am a vegetarian – I don't have to digest anything that wants to digest me.”
This was seven-year-old Amanda Ludlow processing how hogs are the world's true omnivores after having walked into an interesting conversation.
“Yes, Eleanor,” Mrs. Thalia Ludlow was explaining to Amanda's eleven-year-old sister Eleanor, “hogs are dangerous to keep because you really have to feed them up and control their environment well, because yes, they will hunt and eat rats, cats, and even you if they get hungry enough.”
“Yikes,” Eleanor said. “Pork is kinda edgy. Maybe when George gets out of the bathroom throwing up, we don't tell him about man-eating pigs yet – he can't even deal with food we are eating, eating rats. Getting to be a vegetarian is sounding better all the time.”
“That's what I'm doing, because we don't know anything right now about what we're eating, eats!” George said as he came out of the bathroom. “What else are we going to find out? Rabbits eating butterflies? Cows eating sheep or something?”
“Well, actually, although cows don't do that under normal circumstances, there are a few farmers who were bulking up their protein sources that way,” Mrs. Ludlow said.
George went running again.
“Let me know when you are done, because, sheesh, Grandma – like who does that?” Eleanor said.
“Factory farming is an interesting study, and now that we know George has a weak stomach, we're not going to discuss it any more,” Mrs. Ludlow said. “Just know that your grandfather and I, and your Lee cousins, all get meat from local suppliers that we know treat their animals well up to the point when of course they have to be prepared to eat.”
“Well,” Amanda said, “there's plenty of veggies and fruits, and you make the best falafel, Grandma!”
“That barbecue tofu is the whole business,” Eleanor said, “and shakshuka with eggs or chickpea dumpling is too.”
“I'm up for split pea soup with no ham – I may never eat ham again!” George declared as he came out of the bathroom!
“Lentil stuff is good too – and then our Dubois friends make the best red beans and rice!” Amanda said.
“Well,” Mrs. Ludlow said, “I guess we don't need to worry about rats, cats, or eating anything that would eat them and us for a while!”
“Nope,” George, Eleanor, and Amanda said.
“We're all marked safe from blue ham, cows with different diets, and all that!” Amanda said.
“Yep,” Eleanor said.
“And, this also saves the rabbits, because they are so cute!” Amanda said.
“Rabbit? Where?” Capt. R.E. Ludlow, the children's grandfather said.
“Oh, yeah, Papa, because you can entertain the rabbit in so many different ways!” Amanda said.
“This all started with a conversation about blue ham,” Mrs. Ludlow said.
“Oh, that will kill you, quick, fast, and in a hurry,” Capt. Ludlow said.
“Which is why we're not eating the pigs or the rabbits, and they can be whatever color they want!” Amanda said.
“Sounds like a plan,” Capt. Ludlow said.
“I was thinking of falafel this evening,” Mrs. Ludlow said.
“Works for me,” Capt. Ludlow said. “Anybody want to help me cut the veggies that go with that?”
“Me!” Eleanor, George, and Amanda all said.