19 February 2026, Freewriters Community Daily Writing Prompt Day 3019: mouse rider

“OK, so no basketball contest is gonna be complete without somebody heckling the other side, so I got this part down!”

“But, Edwina, we actually like Gracie's grandfather!”

And thus ten-year-old Glendella Ludlow pulled eight-year-old Edwina Ludlow back from the brink.

“Well, yeah,” Edwina said. “It's too bad, though, because I have been doing my research!”

“Research?” Glendella said, and then looked at what Edwina was looking at on their big sister eleven-year-old Eleanor's phone. “Yeah, no, Edwina, because, no. Eleanor, come get your phone back, and put it on single-digit child protection lock!”

“Aw, man – I mean, woman!” Edwina said.

Eventually, Capt. R.E. and Mrs. Thalia Ludlow got a look at what was going on, and Mrs. Ludlow fell out laughing as the captain read what Edwina had researched in his surprised-enough-to-clutch-pearls-if-he-had-them basso profondo voice.

“Best non-curse word insults for people eight years old at a basketball game?”

“Glendella messed up!” Mrs. Ludlow said. “You would have won that game easily because you are that much taller than Mr. Stepforth, and you might still be able to stand up and get off a basket easier than he would from laughing upon hearing Edwina calling him 'you cheese-eating mouse-riding excuse for a point guard!'”

“No, because I would have died from mortification – my Virginian blue-blood all the way back to where a Lea and a Ludlowe were sitting up in King John's court plotting on how they were going to get that man to sign the Magna Carta is trembling!” Capt. Ludlow said.

“What about this one?” Mrs. Ludlow said. “Your socks smell like the last time you got beat and your mama forgot to wash them!”

“That actually is a good one for a high school level game,” Capt. Ludlow said, “but where did the mouse rider one come from?”

“Your shot looks like that time that asteroid came all the way here and missed Earth!” Mrs. Ludlow read out, and at last Capt. Ludlow started laughing.

“And you know Edwina was practicing every one of these!” he said.

“Well, yeah,” Edwina said when confronted with her own research, “because if you gotta heckle folks you gotta do it with gusto – gotta have gusto! Can't be out here like a slow-jiving lazy-eyed lounge lizard excuse for your fan, Papa! But then, we do actually like Mr. Stepforth, so since I've already memorized all that, I'll just save them for the next time my no-good relatives call here because they know we are about to get rich with the sale and they want some of the money. I really have learned from y'all – waste not, want not!”

“OK, we need to talk about how you and I would definitely do this kind of stuff, left alone, but since we both know the Lord Jesus, what would He have to say about us plotting to talk to people like this,” Capt. Ludlow said.

“Well, I looked that up too, but you know, Mr. Stepforth is a nice man,” Edwina said. “But hey: I'm definitely down to call my aunts and uncles a generation of vipers!”

By this time, Capt. Ludlow was turning red from the effort not to both laugh and cry, but he kept on and talked Edwina off the brink, again.

“Because really, only he can, because Papa does understand,” Eleanor said to Glendella later. “Papa understands that pool of anger Edwina lives with because he lives with one too for the same reason.”

“They are a lot alike, but I feel like Papa has his harnessed for good, and Edwina will get there,” Glendella said.

“You're right – the way Papa took down your Grumps when he threatened our soda company is just what always happens,” Eleanor said. “Papa doesn't even need Google – Google probably searched him up for tips on how to take adults all the way out without needing to cuss at them, and then also Papa has the army background, so if you really need to get cussed out, Papa definitely can. There was this one vet who got out of pocket with this woman vet while we were going to pick up Grayson, and Papa walked right over to the situation and said, 'Let me explain this to you in terms you understand, soldier, since you would talk like that to a woman.' Guess who was in the car and had to be dragged out of sight talking about 'Get 'em, Papa – get 'em!'”

“Edwina,” Glendella said with a smile.

“By the time Papa explained to this sergeant what was going to happen to him by the time the Army dishonorably discharged him with all the words,” Eleanor said, “this sergeant was in tears going sir, yes, sir, apologizing to the woman vet, apologizing to the restaurant for disturbing the peace, apologizing to Papa for disgracing the uniform – it was a whole meltdown on his part. Edwina inherits the same budding capabilities, but we want her to bloom out in other ways, too.”

Glendella sighed.

“Y'all know that was Edwina who ran that old woman at the council meeting off the stage, right?” she said. “I don't know how she got patched in there without your phone or Velma's phone, but you know that was her style of insults, right?”

“I don't even need to know all that,” Eleanor said, “because Edwina had your whole 68-year-old grandmother running for her life out of this neighborhood. We all know Edwina has it in her. We just gotta help her not be out here calling folks mouse riders for no reason. When you are eight, and you have a recognizable style of insults already, you need help from those who love you.”

“Agreed,” Glendella said.