Never Say Never

Should I call it insensitivity or simply a misuse of words? Because every time I see someone call another person “careless” just because they mistakenly sent money to the wrong recipient, I find it really insensitive.

Maybe it's because I've been in that exact shoe before. I used to be one of those people who would shake their head and say, “How can someone make such a silly mistake? Like, were you not paying attention?” I thought I was just too meticulous for such things. Until it happened to me and I learned the hard way how quick we are to judge until life humbles us.

I must say, it’s not really a good experience. In fact, it brought real tears to my eyes and it was not just because of the money, but because of the helplessness and the self-blame that followed it.

It happened on a bright, beautiful Sunday. I had gone out with a friend to a popular fun park in Port Harcourt. We had so much fun laughing, taking pictures while also trying different foods. It was one of those carefree outings that leaves you with happy exhaustion. When it was time for me to leave, I booked a ride to go home.

Now, from the moment I got into the car, the driver’s attitude was really off. He was so rude and equally impatient. He barely said a word when I tried to direct him using my regular route. I almost canceled the ride, but I reminded myself to pick my battles. “Just get home Dinma,” I told myself. “Don’t allow this man ruin your day.”

When we got to my destination, I asked him how much the fare was. He rattled off his account number quickly and didn’t bother to repeat it. I don’t know if I was distracted or still annoyed by his behavior, but I listened half-heartedly and didn’t even double check the account name on the transfer page. I just typed the digits I heard him call, sent the money, and told him, “I’ve sent it.”

Then came the twist.

“Madam, I’ve not seen any alert o,” he said.

I opened my bank app and showed him the debit alert with confidence. But his next words hit me like a tsunami:
“Madam, that’s not my account.”

“Ehn? Oga, you say wetin?” (Sir, what did you say?) I replied, completely stunned. At that moment, I didn't even know when I switched from proper English to full-blown Nigerian pidgin. I instantly felt the shock, the disbelief and the regret all hit me at once.

I stood there, frozen. The realization that I had just sent money to a complete stranger was too much to bear. Long story short, I had to send him another transfer. And no don’t bother to ask, because the first one never came back. I tried to reach the bank later, but the process was long and frustrating, and the recipient was not even responding to my messages.

That day, I went home feeling so defeated. Not just because I lost money, but because I had always believed it could never happen to me. I was the one who always double-checked everything and scoffed when others made “avoidable mistakes.”

But life has a way of humbling you. That day, I learned a major lesson and that is Never say never.

Mistakes don’t ask for permission before they happen. They don’t bother giving warnings. They just show up; especially when you least expect them. And honestly, no one is immune to oopsies.

So now, when I see someone making that kind of error, I don’t try to laugh, no matter how amusing it may sound. Instead, I try to offer empathy, because I’ve truly been there. And trust me, it’s not funny when it’s you.

Image is mine
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