The Childhood Dream That Got Away

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As a kid who always fancied the world of animations, I grew envisioning myself being a scientist. Cartoon Network lived rent free in my head and shows like Dexter's laboratory, Robot boy, power puff girls etc were constant reminders why embracing engineering should be my primary objective for a lifelong career.
Whenever I get the opportunity, I would scavenge the area searching for electronic parts just to get a personal interaction of what feels to be like the guys I see on television.

I even begged a friend to make me a lab coat from any white material he could get his hands on to complete the look. This dream stayed with me up until highschool ( SS 2 to be precise ). After a series of failures, it dawned on me that although I loved being an engineer I completely sucked at it. The evidence had been there all along I was just so blinded by the destination I completely ignored the journey. I was terrible at calculus, chemistry made no sense to me and physics felt like it was definitely a product of another planet. The only science subject I was good at was biology but I hated life sciences so I already knew that's a capital HELL NO for me besides how do I even navigate biology without having even a fundamental grasp of the other two. I know the blame for my shortcomings falls on me but anytime I think about it, I can't help but allocate some of it to the school as the teachers for these subjects were low key bad at their job.
After thinking about it for months, I decided to switch into art and as it turns out a lot of my classmates had the same idea as well. The transition was smooth but not a choice I thought I would ever have to make. The plan was to study law as that seemed like the only logical option in the field. Years went by after high but school luck was not on my side, I actually got admission for law in 2017 but issues with finances hindered me from pushing through. Two years later I got admission to study political science and just graduated last year with good grades.

While I was still in uni, I made friends with science students who took out time to tutor me on their various fields. Turns out the mission was not so impossible after all I simply concurred with my fears and that was why those subjects looked like death wishes.
Till this day I still regret leaving the dream to face a misplaced reality. Hopefully I am able to complete building my time machine so I can go back in time to correct that wrong that haunts me to this very day or pursue a second degree to fill the void that lingers in very person
Thank you.