Claire's Crazy Cakes, Bakes and Kitchen Hacks: Chapter 31 - Claire's Infamous Potato Salad

PotAto PotAAto, right? When it comes to potato salad this is not the case. In fact, you know what, when it comes to potatoes in any form the subject is more like a religion, so there are no wishy-washy half-measures in this house.

I have been an utter snob about potato salad for decades and generally insist that I make the potato salad whether we're hosting or going to someone else for a braai (South African BBQ). To me, there is nothing more blasphemous than crappy potato salad: whether it's undercooked potatoes, stingy use of mayonnaise, lack of imagination or overuse of CONDENSED MILK?? What the hell? Why would you even put that in there? So, to be on the safe side, I would rather just do it myself.

Ingredients (serves approximately 10 people)
20 medium potatoes
500g mayonnaise
1 full pack of spring onion (4 or 5 stalks)
200g diced crispy bacon
200g gherkins
4 tablespoons of crack Claire's Crazy Cakes, Bakes and Kitchen Hacks: Chapter 10 - Homecooking with Crack
6 large eggs

Peel and chop the potatoes into cubes, not too big and not too small. You don't want giant wedges of potato with no flavour, but smaller pieces can lead to your potato salad turning into mush.

Throw them into a big stock pot, cover them with water, and boil. I am super lazy, so I put the eggs on top of the potatoes and let them cook at the same time.

While that's on the go, fry up your bacon. Don't murder it, but a bit of a crunch adds a nice texture to the salad. Set aside somewhere safe so opportunistic children or pets don't steal any.

Then you can dice your gherkins/ pickled cucumber and the spring onions.

once your potatoes are cooked (don't overcook them otherwise once again, you'll end up with mush) you can drain them in a colander. I recommend fishing out the eggs 1st because digging for them later is a pain.

Place the eggs into a bowl in the sink and let cold water run over them for about five minutes. This is a great hack for making the eggs easier to peel. This is literally my least favourite part of making potato salad. I hate peeling eggs.

Once your potatoes are drained, put them back in the big pot. It's just easier to mix everything in here and then dish it into something fancy later.

Add the mayonnaise now, but DO NOT STIR. Remember to keep stirring to a minimum as you don't want what? MUSH. Yes, that's right.

Now you can throw in the bacon, then the spring onions and gherkins and then the crack.

Peel your eggs and you can just use a butter knife and dice them in your hands directly into the pot. Or you can use a chopping board and a decent knife if you want to be responsible.

NOW you can stir. Remember not to overdo it. Just make sure the ingredients are evenly distributed and everything is nicely drenched in mayonnaise.

You can literally stick this whole pot in the fridge now. Don't put it onto any glass component or drawer in your fridge. The ingredients will still be warm and you can crack the glass. Look, you shouldn't refrigerate warm food. If you have the luxury of time, you'd ideally let everything cool down to room temperature 1st, but you know what, we break rules where we have to. And no one wants to eat warm potato salad. Yuck.

Leave it in the fridge for two hours and it will be ready to serve. It is ALWAYS better the next day, so if you can make it in advance, I recommend you do.

So there you have it.

My amazing and secret potato salad recipe! I hope you enjoy it!

P.S. I did not take a photo of the finished plated product because I was VERY hungry 😂 better luck next time!