Caught in a Pressure Web.

Continuation...

I was sharing my experience last time on certain important things that I neglected but when it finally dawn on me with the help of my home training and mindset on being contented with what you have and who you are.

A lot of experiences that wasn't good for imitation, sometimes I join a clique of friends that would joke or mock teachers they don't like, talk ill hearted things against fellow student that isn't among them and day immoral words to the females in junior classes, in all statement non was funny to me despite the way they joke and laugh about it, I would just laugh anyway.

That was the very first thread of the pressured web

I forced laughter out of my mouth so I won't be the odd one in the clique, my appearance wasn't unlike the rest because it was just so difficult to sag my trousers or leave my collar shirts unbutton. Even been wayward and irrelevant is stressful that was what a certain teacher told a guy also acting up to be felt among the top swag boys and immediately I overheard that words something clicked in my head, that "I don't belong to this settings".

So from laughter and I'll hearted talks it moved to acts and being disrespectful, that was the second thread of the pressure web. I noticed how they disrespect other colleagues (cliques bullying each other) sometimes resulting to altercations. This got to a point the administration and management in the school started using almost all senior Secondary school three student as bad examples and corrupt pupils, not all though, there was still very disciplined SS three students despite receiving some humiliation and frustration just because they wanted to remain focus and determined on academics and nothing else.

To a point I stopped carrying bags to school only the subjects we had for that day base on the timetable but forgetting that sometimes the teacher will tell us beforehand that we should expect him teach or give us test randomly on any subjects. Well this mistakes made me failed very few test though, I learnt a lesson that has now shaped me for GOOD.

There are times my elder sister would say "I hope you're not mingling with bad boys and girls"? But how do I explain that the "bad friends" are the ones making me to be seen, makes me to be respected by all other juniors even some seniors, you know that feeling of superiority complex.

The ones that would randomly start a chant in the assembly hall when the head teacher or principal is having a speech.
All of these negativity didn't start at massive rate, it was just getting into me little by little, I was pressured my mom to stop giving me snacks instead money, I preferred money because taking food to school seems like a kid, big boys take just lunch money.

Not until one faithful day, I got home before I undress myself I stood at the mirror and looked at myself, I was ashamed, "this is not who I am" I told myself. Just breaking free was not easy, and yes I became hated on, I wasn't as fancy as I was when with them but I really do care. Contentment was all I needed.

I prayed about the situations and immediately I had a total changed of mind and that was it.
Its only a changed mind that can create a shift in reality.

All images are mine. Thank you for stopping by.