Unforgettable Moments (Part 3) the end

Hello everyone! How are you doing? Hopefully you are all doing great! It does not feel that we are in the last part of my writing about unforgettable moments. I was so happy that even in the reality, my family was broken, my parents got divorced, my father got married again, but I was in a state that I felt like my family got united once more in a life time. My relationship with my father was getting healed even so much better than I had before. We had so much quality time together after everything that happened to me. He was there for me and always supported me in every way. I was so glad that my father even more taking care of me.

This a pic when we were in event in Surabaya

When I went back home to Malang, my city, my father was still in Surabaya. We still kept in touch and video calling every day to get to know each other. The day had come, my wedding day at December 4th 2015, my father came to Malang and attended my wedding. He was side by side with my mother. For the first time, I felt like I was the happiest child in the world after this time. I saw my parents getting together on my very special day. What a day! If I could turn back time, I would go to that moment. Every my father’s birthday I used to come to him and celebrated it together. He looked so happy for sure because I came to him for his special day. I was so grateful for everything happened in my life. I know God’s timing is definitely the best.

After the wedding event, my father went back to his home in Surabaya. He used to commute by motorcycle. (For your information, I still use his motorcycle until now. I brought his motorcycle to Malang because it is no longer used in Surabaya. It includes his legacy to me. Everytime I use it, automatically I remember him). My father was a lovely person, he always used to kiss my forehead to say goodbye. It became such a trademark of him. Not long after, I became pregnant and gave birth to my first child. My father visited me a few days in Malang to see his first grandchild. He looked so happy and loved my child so much. He helped me to take care of my son meanwhile I was still recovering my condition after C-section.

This s pic when we were hanging out together

The relationship between my father and my mother were better even though they were not too much talking each other. Even they were not getting back together, they were just fine. However I was still hoping that they would get back together as a couple someday. There was nothing I really wanted for more than they got back together. No other. It was a very happy moment to see them both hanging out and even there was a moment my father, my mother, my brother and I were sleeping together in a bedroom. It was happened in Surabaya when I stayed there for view days.

Even in the car we still had fun

I remember when the first time my father had symptoms of an illness that caused him passing away. The moment when I was In Yogyakarta with my husband and my son, we were on holiday. My son was sick there and I video called my father to tell him that my son was not okay. Then when I was video calling him, I was shocked by what I saw on my phone screen. I saw my father’s face was changed. When we were talking on video calling, he looked thin and his cheeks were sunken. It was just view days perhaps I did not call my father. I was so shocked and suddenly I was crying. That was the first time I was crying in front of my father about his condition. I was like asking to him, what was happening, how could he turned out to be skinny like that. I had never seen my father looking like that in my life. He had a quite big and healthy body. He was a very strong man I had ever known before. He lived a healthy life, did not smoke ever, and used to do exercise almost every day. I knew it. What was happened? He told me that he had an illness that made him looked like that, a typhoid made him losing his appetite so bad. I answered to him why. Even he got sick, he had to eat no matter what. I told that to him while dropping tears. He looked at me and also turned out to cry because he saw me crying. That moment was the first time I saw him crying even though we were in a long distance. I felt so sad and I did not know might be I got a bad feeling that time.

This is him when he got sick and we were video calling

As the day passed, my father was still battling typhoid. He also had to stay in the hospital for several days. He also went back and forth to the doctor for checks up. Since my father was sick with typhus and the disease was contagious, I was a little afraid because if I visited him my child would get infected. So, I reduced my intensity in meeting and visiting him. We could only communicate via telephone and video call. Once, it was just my husband and I who visited him at the hospital in Surabaya and I left my child for a while.

Once, my father went to my city at my suggestion to get checked up. My father complained about having difficulty sleeping, always sweating, weakness, his stomach felt not good so he had no appetite and not feeling well. In the end, I took my father to my regular medical specialist doctor and had him checked there. The doctor advised my father to have a laboratory check up because there was something wrong with his body. This could be seen from the yellowing of my father's palms, which should normally be pink or red. But in reality my father's palms were pale and yellow. I told my father to immediately check the laboratory to find out for sure what really happened. My father answered that he would check laboratory when he returned to Surabaya.

This is my favorite picture of my father & mother in Batu city

Right when there was a Covid pandemic in 2020, it became the bleakest year of my life. I rarely visit my father in Surabaya because there were many restrictions on traveling and I have to be locked down or stay at home, let alone go out of town. Because of that, we rarely see each other and our time is very limited. Once, on his birthday that same year, I was determined to meet him and visit my father in Surabaya because I really missed him. At that time, I remember that his face had become very thin and his body was very thin too and he even walked slowly and was weak because of his illness. The appearance was very painful for me, I was very sad to see it all. I couldn't bear to see my father's condition seem to be getting worse. I can't do anything and can only support him and always pray for him. On his birthday, we just went out for lunch near my father's house and spent time together after. We couldn’t be like before where we could travel so far freely because my father's condition is weak.

When I was going back to my city in Malang, I said goodbye to my father. I remember once at that time I hugged him while crying. I hugged his thin body which was very different from his previous strong body. At that time my father looked weak and old, he was 53 years old at that time. I just told him to take care of his health, get well soon, stay strong and enthusiastic because I really loved him and needed him as a father. I returned to Malang and I always thought about my father's situation there.

My wedding with my family except my brother

I had not visited my father for several months because of the pandemic, but at that time I felt something bad was going to happen so I had to quickly meet my father. I promised him I would see him on Saturday but it seemed like it was too late. At that time, when my husband and I prayed at home, I prayed for my father. I really prayed for him, surrendered to God and believed that God would give the best for my father. After we finished praying for about an hour, my phone rang and I started to have a bad feeling. It was my aunt, my father's sister, calling me. She gave the news that my father passed away. Immediately, I became hysterical and cried uncontrollably. I told my husband and hugged him while crying. My heart was broken and very sad to hear that my father was no longer in the world. I couldn't meet him one last time. The last day I saw him was when he was celebrating his birthday. What I regret is that I was going to see him on Saturday and by Friday he had already passed away. He left me. Even though I really missed him, I really wanted to see his condition and accompany him in his last moments. I really miss his face, his smile and laughter, his jokes, his behavior and his attention to me.

I and my husband went to Surabaya right away to attend my father’s funeral. I was crying and crying on the way. I wanted to see him alive. I wanted to meet him like before, still I couldn’t accept this tragedy. I asked to God, why? Why did he take my father so fast. I think it was too fast and he was not too old to leave me. I wish I was only dreaming, it was all just a bad dream and when I woke up my father was still there. I was not ready for that happened in my life. I feel like I did not do anything yet to him, to make him happy in this life. It was not enough time for me. I thought it was not fair. But, at the end I was told that it was God’s plan and we never knew. What we know that God give the best for us and He won’t let us down. He won’t leave us alone.

This is a pic where my father laid down and I prayed for him

Months and years passed, I still miss him. One day, I went to his cemetery and lay on my father’s grave. I sprinkled flowers on it and prayed for him. I said to him that I missed him so much, I wish I could see him again. I told him that my son has already grown up and he missed his grandfather too. My life has changed without him. My life has never be the same without his presence around. I told him that I always love him and remember him all the time. I have a thought perhaps if my father and my mother did not separate, they would be still together and my father would be still alive until now.

However, it was up to God’s will, we never know what is going to happen in our lives and our future. One thing I know and I learn is that God always has a beautiful plan and design for our lives even though it has to be so tough. In every tears there is always something to be grateful for. Believe in God and He never disappoint us. Without my father here with me, I become more independent and strong, surrender and rely more on God in life. That is the most important thing in life. After everything happened in my life, I know God is always good. He still cares for me and bless me in every way of my life. Thank God for my father, mother, husband, child and everything.

Goodbye dear father, I love you until we will meet again...

Thank you for reading this until the end of the story. Hope you all like it and I hope you always be grateful and use the time so well for family and friends and all you care about ^^
God bless you :)