The Whiny Rocker Girl, Puppy Love, and Besties (1)

Hello dear Hivers around the world, wherever you are. How are you doing? Hopefully, you are all doing great. Not long ago I remembered I wanted to tell you about my school life and the experiences I had at school that I still remember to this day. I hope you're interested...

This is me and my bestie, Sylvi when we were working together.

Oh, one more thing,as you can see, we often wear twin clothes because we deliberately buy the same clothes. We match, don't we?

Actually there is nothing interesting that can be said from my school days because I was a quiet and shy child. I tend to be insecure when it comes to friendships and I don't know why maybe I felt like I was not beautiful or good at talking. From the moment I entered kindergarten, I was a crybaby. The first time I entered class, I cried and did not want to be left by my mother. In class I always look at the window, checking whether my mother is still there to accompany me. I was not used to not being with my mother. I had to be independent and met new people who were completely unfamiliar and that made me cry and sad even more.

This is me, Sylvi, and Fenny. Fenny had been in Hongkong for working. This was in between when she was returning to Indonesia and we met up.

Just imagine, I was a mommy’s little girl who had to go to school and started facing the outside world on my own. A bit of an exaggeration but it's the truth. The first time I went to school, I felt bullied. This bullying was actually verbal. So I remember, there was a female friend of mine and she always mocked my work in class. At that time I was coloring and there was a picture of the sun so I colored the sun a bright orange color. Haven't I done the right thing? My friend made fun of me and told me that if the sun was colored like that then the world would be hot because it is too hot, the color is too bright, and so on. When she said that I cried and it didn't happen just once but several times. Maybe I wasn't strong enough so I told my mother about this. Then, my mother went to school and talked to my friend and warned her not to bother me anymore. I actually don't have any childhood photos, they're rare. There are some but I can't find them, too bad.

Entering elementary school, I was more able to socialize and open up. I was no longer afraid and closed off like I was at the start of kindergarten. I started to be able to chat with friends and had friends although not many. In fact, my mother said that I used to be one of those children who liked to chat in class during lessons. I don't think so if I am compared to my older brother. When compared to him, I'm very different. I was quieter and less able to mingle and get along, while my older brother was a chatterbox or get along easily with his friends. He was a boy who likes to joke, was mischievous, and was liked or likable by his friends. He was also a boy known to his friends. I was the opposite, I would be a dull and introvert. My brother was more successful in terms of friendships and he blended in very quickly in new environments. My brother and I went to the same school when we were in elementary school, so I was known not because of myself but because I was the little sister of Devid, my brother's name. Yeah, it was like oh that's Devid's little sister. Yes, that's how it was and on the other hand, I actually felt that I got benefit from it.

This is me and my older brother, Devid.

With the advantage of having a famous older brother, I felt protected and no one would dare be naughty to me, or bully me. At least they wouldn't dare do anything if they knew I had an older brother, that was the advantage of having an older brother. Even though at home we often fought and he often teased me until I cried, kind of brother sister issues, but we are still brother and sister, right. It doesn’t matter. With my older brother at the same school, I also felt like I was not alone. We went to school and came home from school together.

When I was in 6th grade, I remember that was when puppy love happened. I was a girl who was still innocent with all my innocence. I never liked my male friends. I didn't know about that of course. However, there was one boy who liked me, who had crush on me, let’s call his name, Dc. I remember he gave me chocolate on Valentine's Day, Silverqueen. The chocolate was no packaging and only the packaging inside was made of aluminum, if I'm not mistaken, there this Dc was decorated with pens or markers with love writings. I just found out about the feeling at the time of that incident. I did not expect that kid liked me, had feelings on me, and gave me a chocolate, because I was friends with him and sat next to him. He was a smart boy and handsome though. I just realized it when I was in junior high school. It was too late. Hahaha.

These are my friends from junior high school, this is our reunion time at a cafe.

I remember one moment to this day that sticks and is funny. I was still at 6th grade, I was invited to a birthday event for my friend who is also a friend of Dc, and I promised to come to the event. During the event, I was matched with him. They played a game, I was asked to pull out the pins that were attached to Dc's clothes and they all laughed and matched the two of us. I saw Dc's happy expression and really liked it. Yes, I knew he did like me. But of course, I haven't felt any of those feelings, because maybe I'm still innocent and still a child. Just imagine I was 10 or 11 years old, how could I have that kind of feeling? Hahaha.

Not only Dc, there was another boy who also had a crush on me. Let’s just call him Hk. Hk was Dc's friend too and they were quite close at that time. We often joke and chat together. It was unexpected that HK also liked me or had feeling on me, because we really had fun chatting, talk often and connect. We both liked smack down very much. You know? Wrestling stuff, I used to watch it on TV and I never missed it. I watched it with my brother. Ah yes, one more thing, I used to be a typical tomboyish girl. I was not feminine at all because maybe I did not have a sister on the contrary my brother is a boy so I liked male things like smack down, football, etc and had some male friends too.

This is my best friend, Ema. She is in Jakarta right now. This picture took when we were in Museum Angkut, Batu.

I like and listen to rock and hard songs, which most girls don't like. I used to like wearing clothes like boys, I liked pants rather than skirts, and only t-shirts. I did not like pink and boy’s shoes. But, yes, I was still like a girl with my long hair. I'm also embarrassed to have to tell it. It is very different from now, I am very feminine even though I still like things that men like, sometimes. So from that I still wonder to this day, how could a girl like me be liked by boys at that time? I felt like I was not beautiful and not feminine at all. Maybe, that means they liked me as I was. That was just a puppy love.

Back to my friend called Hk, earlier, he often called me from the landline at that time because there weren't any cell phones, right? He also often gave me greeting cards, such as Christmas cards, which he sent from the post to my house. He confessed that he had crushed on me over the phone at that time, and he knew that Dc also liked me. I just found out at that time that the boy was jealous of me. Imagine, we were still children and already had feelings like that. It is funny to remember, isn’t it?

This is a photo shoot when I took a photo as a band member and was inspired by Avril Lavigne.

Entering middle school, I grew a little older. I was about 12 years old and I was having my first period. That means I was entering puberty. It was not an easy thing. I had to adapt again to the situation and small pimples started to grow on my face, especially my forehead. That was really embarrassing. I felt insecure and accepted fate. ha ha ha. My social circle had also broadened, I was not only friends with a few people but everyone. Yes, but I still had close friends at that time, one of whom has survived until now is Sylvi. She was actually my brother's friend who didn't make it to the next grade and eventually became my best friend.

Things like this often happen, don't they? She's a skinny girl with glasses who was nice and suits me. We used to go everywhere together. We both liked the band Westlife and Backstreet Boys at that time. We collected the magazines that Westlife had there and we collected them. When I graduated from college and started working, Sylvi and I worked together in the same office. That was very fun. We worked together more or less for 1 year. It added to our bond and I did not feel bored at that job. At that time we used to go to the mall and shopped together. We talked about everything and took photos in every free hour at the office. Until now I still have kept those photos.

I think that's it for now. I'm sharing this story into 2 parts because it's still a long story. I hope you don't get bored and keep following along. See you in the next part...

Thank you for supporting my content. I really appreciate it ^^

CharinaKim