Forgiving is not justice, it's wisdom– LOH 250 contest// Perdonar no es justicia, es sabiduria– concurso LOH 250 (eng/esp)
Hello, greetings to everyone.
Today, I’m joining this community for the first time, and I won’t deny that I was motivated by the topic of Forgiveness suggested by @cautiva-30. It’s truly a pleasure to be able to participate. I’ve always viewed life from a practical perspective, and this act is no exception to this "lifestyle", you could say.
All the questions are thought-provoking, and I’d like to address all three of them.
Should we forgive everyone? For me, forgiveness is not an obligation but a conscious choice we make to free ourselves from the weight of resentment. From a practical standpoint, it’s not always possible or healthy for me to forgive everyone, especially in situations where the harm was deep, intentional, and unaccompanied by remorse. However, forgiveness is not a gift we give to the other person but an act of compassion toward ourselves. When we forgive, we stop allowing resentment to occupy space in our minds and hearts.
But there are nuances: forgiving doesn’t mean allowing someone to hurt us over and over again. We can choose to let go of hatred without keeping that person in our lives. Integrity lies in recognizing that not everyone deserves our trust, but carrying anger only harms us. A person who loves life understands that forgiveness is, above all, a path to inner peace—not a rigid moral duty.
No less thought-provoking is the question of whether we should always forgive. I believe forgiveness is not a straight line; it’s a human process, full of ups and downs. We shouldn’t force ourselves to forgive always, because that would deny our right to feel pain, to process it, and to heal at our own pace. However, there’s a key difference between forgiving and forgetting. Forgiveness doesn’t mean justifying the harm or reconciling with the person who hurt us, but rather choosing not to remain chained to the past.
From a practical perspective, there are situations where forgiveness comes with time, when we realize that holding onto resentment keeps us stuck. But there are also cases where forgiveness may never come—and that’s okay. What’s important is not letting resentment define our lives. A person of integrity knows that, while forgiveness is liberating, it’s not a debt to be paid at the cost of their own dignity.
But imagine, ladies—if forgiving those we believe deserve it is undoubtedly difficult, how do we handle those who don’t? In this case, forgiveness is not an act of weakness but of emotional strength. When someone hurts us and shows no remorse, our first instinct is to hold a grudge, as if that would "punish" them. But in reality, the only one affected is us: resentment eats away at joy, clouds the present, and keeps us from moving forward.
From a practical viewpoint, forgiving those who don’t deserve it is an act of self-liberation. We don’t do it for them, but for ourselves, because we deserve to live without the weight of bitterness. It doesn’t mean excusing their actions or giving them another chance, but denying them the power to keep controlling our peace of mind. A person who values life understands that forgiveness, even in the hardest cases, is a step toward emotional freedom. It’s not justice—it’s wisdom.
If I look at this topic from my perspective as a doctor, I’d say that resentment is a cancer, forgiveness is the chemotherapy, and removing toxic people from our lives is the cure.
A hug, and until next time.
I am a Doctor of Microbiology, a lover of nature, literature, music, cooking, and life itself.
A staunch defender of family and children.
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Hola, un saludo a todas.
Hoy entro a la comunidad por primera vez y no voy a negar que fue motivada por el tema del Perdon que sugiere @cautiva-30. Es muy grato poder participar.Siempre he visto la vida desde un sentido práctico y este acto no escapa a este "Estilo de vida", podría decir.
Todas las preguntas son sugerentes y me gustaría referirme a las tres.
¿Perdonar a todos? Para mi perdonar no es una obligación, sino una elección consciente que hacemos para liberarnos del peso del resentimiento. Desde un punto de vista práctico, no siempre me es posible ni saludable perdonar a todos, especialmente si hablamos de situaciones donde el daño fue profundo, intencional y no hubo arrepentimiento. Sin embargo, el perdón no es un regalo que le damos al otro, sino un acto de compasión hacia nosotros mismos. Cuando perdonamos, dejamos de permitir que el rencor ocupe espacio en nuestra mente y nuestro corazón.
Pero hay matices: perdonar no significa permitir que alguien nos lastime una y otra vez. Podemos elegir soltar el odio sin mantener a esa persona en nuestra vida. La integridad está en reconocer que no todos merecen nuestra confianza, pero que cargar con el enojo solo nos perjudica. Una persona que ama la vida entiende que el perdón es, ante todo, un camino hacia la paz interior, no un deber moral rígido.
No menos sugerente me parece lo de si debemos perdonar siempre. Yo considero que el perdón no es una línea recta; es un proceso humano, lleno de altibajos. No debemos forzarnos a perdonar siempre, porque eso negaría nuestro derecho a sentir dolor, a procesarlo y a sanar a nuestro ritmo. Sin embargo, hay una diferencia clave entre perdonar y olvidar. Perdonar no implica justificar el daño ni reconciliarnos con quien nos hirió, sino elegir no vivir atados al pasado.
Desde lo práctico, hay situaciones donde el perdón surge con el tiempo, cuando entendemos que aferrarnos al rencor nos estanca. Pero también hay casos en los que el perdón puede no llegar nunca, y está bien. Lo importante es no permitir que el resentimiento defina nuestra vida. Una persona íntegra sabe que, aunque el perdón es liberador, no es una deuda que deba pagarse a costa de su propia dignidad.
Pero imagínense chicas que si perdonar a quien creemos que lo merece es sin dudas difícil como hacer con quien no lo merece.
En este caso el perdón no es un acto de debilidad, sino de fortaleza emocional. Cuando alguien nos lastima y no muestra remordimiento, nuestro primer impulso es guardar rencor, como si eso lo "castigara". Pero en realidad, el único afectado somos nosotros: el rencor corroe la alegría, nubla el presente y nos impide avanzar.
Desde una visión práctica, perdonar a quien no lo merece es un acto de auto-liberación. No lo hacemos por ellos, sino por nosotros, porque merecemos vivir sin el peso de la amargura. No significa excusar su acción ni darles otra oportunidad, sino negarles el poder de seguir controlando nuestra paz mental. Una persona que valora la vida entiende que el perdón, incluso en los casos más difíciles, es un paso hacia la libertad emocional. No es justicia, es sabiduría.
Si veo este tema desde mi lugar de médico, diría que el rencor es un Cáncer, perdonar el Citostático y alejar de nuestras vidas a quien nos hizo daño La Cura.
Un abrazo y hasta pronto.
Soy Médico Microbióloga, amante de la naturaleza, las letras, la música, la cocina y la vida en sí.
Férrea defensora de la familia y los niños
Los textos son creados por mi, sin uso de IA
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Hello,
You wrote beautiful words about forgiveness and I agree on most of them. Yes, forgiveness is an act towards ourselves but I think sometimes we just have to move on without forgiving. Forgetting is not an option from the beginning, but, again, sometimes I think we should move on instead of forgiving.
Have a nice one,
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It's very true. There are cases in which the desire to forgive will never come. The important thing is not to let resentment define our lives. As you say, we have the right to feel pain, to process it, and to heal at our own pace, and that reflects the key between forgiving and forgetting. Your perspective as a doctor is very moving: "I would say that resentment is cancer, forgiveness is chemotherapy, and eliminating toxic people from our lives is the cure." The decision to forgive is up to each individual. It's not justice, it's wisdom. Thank you for sharing your experiences, and welcome to the Ladies of the Hive community,
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I admire your honesty and clarity. Choosing forgiveness as a form of self-compassion rather than a transactional duty, that’s so freeing. It’s brave to say it’s okay not to forgive everyone, and smart to treat resentment like something you actively let go of. Your insight that forgiveness isn’t justice but wisdom really resonates, it’s a reminder that peace begins within. Thank you for bringing such grounded strength into this conversation. Though you are joining the community for the first time, am glad you find it more motivating and I hope we see more of you 🤗
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I quite agree with you. Forgiveness is self-librating, we're not doing it for the other person but ourselves. Holding resentment can hinder one from moving forward.
Thanks for sharing your view and welcome to the community. Hope to see more of you.