When In Need, Start with your own Circle
Has it ever happened to you that random people you don't know or have never spoken to just reach out to your DMs to seek financial help?
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And I do not mean big money for medical treatment like surgeries or your landlord sent you packing out, and you need some huge amount to sort your bills, which one person might not be able to solve. I mean a little help as borrowing money to buy something.
Borrowing money from people is not a bad thing; most people have reached their broke point and need to ask their friends or close ones for help until they can stand on their feet again.
But what I do not understand is when someone reaches their broke point and they leave their friends and close ones to seek help from someone who doesn't know them or has never held a conversation before. I find this weird, and it has happened to me several times on Hive.
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Someone I never knew will dm me asking me to lend them Hive, and we have never chatted before in my dm like that was our first conversation, when I see such message, the first thing that comes to my mind is who onboarded them to the hive platform, can't they ask the person for such help, if their reputation is a bit high, definitely they would have make some friends either on the hive blockchain or even on discord during hang out and chats, why did they leave all those people and feel so comfortable to ask a stranger for help... That is not cool.
Let us compare this scenario to real life. It is like ignoring all your neighbors, leaving all the people who leave in your street that you do greet and communicate with, that knows where you live and can actually help because they know where to find you if anything goes wrong, you left all those people and move to the fifth street and knock on a random door there to ask the person who opens the door to you for financial help, really weird right?
When we need help, the first people that should come to mind are those we call friends or people who know us and won't question our identity or intention.
You have a higher chance of getting help from those who know you and people you relate with than from a stranger.
Just call me Burl.
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You are right, Burl. If those in your circles cannot help you, especially when it comes to borrowing, how sure can a stranger help? Everyone needs to be careful, especially when someone you don't talk to at all, not even engaging on your posts, and then they show up to borrow from you. One just needs to be careful. I have experienced the same thing, too.
Yeah, I just find it weird... when you have money, there are some people that you will spend the money together with or flex with or still just feel like giving them because you have it, so when you are in trouble as well, seek those people that enjoy the good times with you not a random stranger... I even find it strange they feel comfortable to ask a stranger for help.
You are right I find these amazing to begin with if you help needed ask people you
Know personally not someone you met for the first time it kinda weird actually thanks for the right up
You hit the nail right on the head. I hate such attitudes, I've had several of my friends whom we weren't close before but just said hi to each other back then and after so many years we loose contact only for them to reach out and say hi once and the next day they start asking for help.
If I have excess to spare fine and good, but as long as I don't have I won't go the extra mile. I just find that habit very irritating
It is a bad habit... I have heard a similar situation, but this person was not my friend, I just know his user, he dm me asking for loan which i borrowed him and he failed to pay on the day he promised and i had to remind him days later, he later paid and the following day he came again asking for another loan with an excuse that he want to buy a cardigan for his daughter, I didn;t even bother to reply.
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Well said but self dependent is the best and asking help can hurt self esteem. This is my personal perspective, you’ve share a nice post. Thanks
your perspective is valid, bt then sometimes we can't always solve all the problems on our own... It all depends on the problem too..
You’ve point but when we start depending on others for help, we get used to it and that can be something that can lower our self-esteem. Thanks for your reply. I appreciate your point of view.
Makes no sense indeed! At least try first with your circle, if that doesn't work out, find other means and only use random strangers as a last resort. I probably would find it extremely hard to do that even as a last resort lol
We are alike regarding this, when I need help.I dm my close friends first and if they don't seem to be able to help, I ask people who I relate with and know we share little bond and we good enough for me to seek their help, but a total stranger, no way especially if it deals with money.
That's true. I also felt it wired. In rare cases I need help and when I need it will ask about it to my family, than friends after that relatives. That's they sequences I follow when I need financial help because I know they will borrow me some money as they know me well.
nice, I follow same pattern, There is no mincing word with family, I go straight to the point without shame, cos even if they turn me down, I won't feel offended.