Gut Feeling: Should I ask?

When to ask? When not to ask?

I know there are many young people who are conflicted with the simple thought of trusting their gut feelings. Like I say, as you get older, it gets easier because things become clearer.

When is it right to trust your gut feeling? How do you even identify instincts and separate it from what our emotions would normally say? How many times have you made the mistake of leading with what you think is right than trusting instincts?

I was a young man once (hey, I’m not that old either) so I know I’ve had to get to the point where I trained myself to trust my instincts. It only gets better with practice though. Why am I even writing about this? Well because seeing two young people interact on the BRO discord left me inspired.

I watched one admit their helplessness and the other go “meh. Deal with it.” I wondered, did these two ever have the same thoughts I did growing up as a young man and morphing into the adult I am today? Did they question every decision they made and hesitate at every turn?

I think they do. They are growing and learning and being taught. It won’t happen immediately. It takes time. Yet, do you know when to ask and when not to ask? I’d really like to see answers to this one.

I get that when going into a venture, we would definitely need all the information we can get. We should try to gather knowledge and you know what they say, “Knowledge is power”.

So, when at crossroads where even your knowledge fails you, do you tune in to your instincts? I’ve had countless situations where I had listened to my gut and it saved me from way too much trouble. However, it did not just happen over night.

The beautiful thing about mistakes is, they are not the definition of who you are. They are subtle indicators to your weaknesses and if used correctly becomes your strength. When you make a mistake, and you accept and acknowledge that it was indeed one that you would not want to repeat again, you’ll see it coming from a mile the next time you come across it.

So what does this have to do with guts? In the sense that honing your instincts require you to stumble a few times. You know that thing where your gut tells you “this way” and then logic and reason says “no, that way”, it can be pretty scary especially for people who have no idea how to navigate life.

They become torn between asking for advice and just doing what feels right. Speaking from experience, there’s a thin line between seeking advice and taking it. Let me explain.

Image by Arek Socha from Pixabay

We already get the picture I was trying to paint with guts and reason. Now, I know we understand what knowledge has to do with that. But do you understand the difference between suggestions and corrections?

A young man who has no idea what to do, who’s led a life full of mistakes and constantly has his past play before him might be too scared to trust himself. He would rather listen to what others have to say about him and for him. It’s more comfortable that way. Less risky and painful. Except it’s not.

On the other hand, we have another young man who’s also led a life full of mistakes and his past also haunts him. But unlike the first guy, this one wants full control of his life. While he takes corrections and learns from mistakes, he also learns to make decisions not disregarding people.

For some reason, not like this was the exact scenario, but watching these two young people interact made my mind go “pop!”

So when exactly is it alright to ask? And how do you know that asking isn’t another way of declaring your helplessness for others to live your life for you? This would be a very interesting discussion if I see some reactions in the comments.

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