A fuel to the final destination of better
Disappointment can be a tough emotion to navigate, but it can also be a valuable teacher. Although no one likes to be disappointed, it's an experience that is often inevitable, as it comes with some of life's great lessons. Looking at my life, if there's one thing that I'm grateful for, it's for all those times I was told "No" instead of "yes." All those times that I had people promise me, only to dash my hopes. Those times were trying times indeed, but it's also the same period that I actually started living, after realizing that no one was coming to save me.
You see, the problem with being disappointed starts when one sees it as a punishment, not a valuable lesson. I remember one time a friend was telling me how she reached out to someone she considers family for financial support, and he told her that he works really hard for his money; he can't just part with it. Adding that if he can work to earn, she could do too, without being lazy and looking for handouts. Those words hurt my friend so badly that she shed a tear while sharing the experience with me.
So I asked her, "What did you do next?" And she asked back, "What was I supposed to do?" A response I wasn't expecting so I went further to inquire if she took the guy's words as motivation to improve her life. She was quiet for a bit, then she responded, "What sort of motivation will I get from someone who ridiculed me?" I cut him off, and that ended the friendship. I took a critical look at her and saw that she didn't act on the words to improve herself. After the conversation, she went on to ask me for financial assistance, which beyond irritated me.
I did assist her, but not without giving her a piece of my mind, explaining to her the need to use people turning her down or talking down on her as motivation to be better. I have also shared my part of disappointment. I remember being in a lowly place and reaching out to a few friends for financial assistance, but all I got was "Sorry, can't help you." The one that pained me the most was when a friend told me, "God will provide better days ahead." I needed financial assistance, but here you are, giving me words of mouth and affirmations.
Right there and then, I swore to be self-sufficient and never ask anyone for financial support again. So far, it's been working for me. Personally, I always turn disappointment into fuel and drive myself to greatness. I don't just feel the pain of being disappointed; I channel that pain into something productive, to ensure such treatment doesn't repeat itself again.
In concluding this piece, I have since learned to be realistic with my expectations—that's one way to develop an abrasive side towards disappointment. I have also learned the importance of having plan B, C, D etc... I have come to always be prepared and alert to take charge of whatever situation that I find myself without being victimized.
Above is my response to the Inleo prompt day 24. You can participate Here
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If only we can channel our disappointments to lessons, we'll be able to become better persons. You did a good thing by helping and educating your friend so she could see the bright side of such words and acts of disappointment. It's surely nothing anybody would want to experience, but what if we did? Disappointments should make us develop that self-sufficiency mindset, like you did. It's something it has taught me too; to depend on God and myself, and if anyone decides to help, fine. But I don't expect it at all.
That's such a great mindset to keep you going at life 🤝🏾
Yeah.
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