Union of love rather than a contract..QC prompt #162.
Pleasant greetings to you all hivers. Happy new month đź‘‹
No matter how we try to look at the issue of marriage, or how many ways we try to go about it, it still won't change the truth that marriage is a God ordained institution and if it is not done right, the end result is usually chaos, heartbreak and betrayals.
Marriage is the coming together of two consenting adults who both agree to do life together under a Divine covenant irrespective of life's blessings or difficulties, with love as its central theme.
Is this not why most priests officiating at a wedding usually asks the bride and groom thus…
”Do you groom/bride take this one to be your lawfully wedded spouse in sickness or Heath, in riches or poverty, forsaking all others till death do you both part”.
When either a bride or a groom says I do to those words,they are say Yes to a covenant not just a contract.
So in response to the #qcprompt, I will not marry primarily for mutual benefit. This is because I don't view marriage as just a contract. It is a lifelong journey, which if done right from the beginning, would have no exit
For me to choose to get married to a man, then it means that I ought to have some affection and likeness for that man. I believe that likeness should precede love as there is no such thing as love at first sight like we see in movies.
Also, there is a need to identify the type of love that is existing in that relationship. The Greeks have specified 4major types of love which are Agape, Storage, Philia and Eros.
In most romantic relationships, what they feel is Eros, as it is a spark-fire love but sadly it dies out at the slightest emergence of a problem and that is when you see couples begin to loathe and fight themselves.
Marriage for mutual benefit does not do society any good socially. It might do the economy and politics some good but at what cost? Is it at the cost of happiness, peace of mind and rest? If this is the cost, then it is too high a price for me to pay.
Marriage is a beautiful venture where mutual love (agape), respect, patience, understanding and care thrives. Qualities like this won't be seen in marriages based solely on mutual benefit. What would be prevalent are selfishness and personal gain and when those are not on the table, then comes chaos.
Does society judge mutual benefit marriages?
I won't outrightly say a yes to this but one thing stands out and that is the fact that society always knows when a marriage is based on mutual benefit rather than mutual affection. Tongues wag and whispers flow but still applauds roar whenever two people get married for mutual benefit.
Sometimes, it might look like marriages based on mutual benefit last longer but I am not of that school of thought and this is because I have seen a lot of women get hurt, battered and broken out of marriages based on mutual benefit. Those women who choose to remain, live as shadows of themselves and that isn't really living, is it?
Thank you all for reading.
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It is not living o but existing and that's the worst thing anyone can allow themselves to do just to be married.
Any marriage that lacks mutual affection, in most cases hits the rocks, except the partner - the one giving the affection, decide to endure. But I ask, to what gain?
Granted, there should be mutual gains in a marriage relationship, but using that as a bedrock to enter the marriage will do the partners and the marriage no good.
Marriage of "use what you have to gain what you want" na big kasala and e dey end with premium tears.
!BBH
Exactly o sis. Every relationship has it own gains mutually but that should not be the major reason for tying oneself down in marriage
Manually curated by @funshee
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