Gone but remain in our memories

Green Simple Elegant How To Become Coach Blog Post Instagram Post.jpg

Hello hivers. I hope you're all doing good.
I started looking after him in 2019, I can't remember the exact month and day but I remembered the year. He had his first accident. Fall from his bed. He's the kind of person that wouldn't listen to you. He would do what he wants. I remembered seeing him with a big black eye around his eyes due to his fall. He was 88 years old at that time. He was also treated with his gall bladder because of some problem at that time and he was discharged after almost 3 months. During that time I go and look after him in the hospital on alternate days. I alternate with his own caregiver. His wife is still around and the same age as him. Each of them have their own caregiver. He's my lady boss father by the way and I still come to visit him once in a while after he was discharged. We grew fond of each other. He's a sweet old man.

In 2022 he had his 2nd fall and again landed in the hospital. This time in a different hospital. Much farther than the previous one. By the way after his first fall he's been using a walking frame to support himself while walking. He also needed to be assisted by his caregiver in case he was out of balance. He's quite hard headed and sometimes doesn't sleep at night. He would walk around. During that time the caregiver was sleeping when the accident happened. I looked after him during the day and the caregiver took the night shift. He stayed there for another 2 months before he was discharged.

Over the years I have witnessed how his mental and physical health deteriorated. He becomes demented. He has hallucinations and worst, not getting sleep at night. He can stay two nights without sleeping. There were times that I would go there at night to look after him so both the caregivers can rest and sleep. Even his wife was also affected. She's also demented, weak and fragile but better compared to her husband. She would just sit in one corner, read her books or play games on her iPad. Whenever he cannot sleep at night he would make all the sounds and disturb everyone. Screaming and shouting. We're only scared he would collapse or fall. Then last July another accident happened. He fell and tore some skin in his eyebrows. It was dawn when it happened. He was rushed to the hospital. I went there in the morning to take over his caregiver so she can sleep. His mood can swift anytime. From good to worse. He will insist on going home and kept shouting to all the nurses and doctors to take him home. They even restrain him to keep him from falling.

The view in his room.

IMG_20250815_120818.jpg
During those times his dementia becomes worse. He still recovers from his fall turns aggressive sometimes. He started hitting and kicking nurses. We also didn't escape it. But there are times that he is calm and ok.

received_1433875601059455.jpeg

He would talk to me about his life back then when he's on right senses, but most of the time he's not. He is quite fast also, I mean his hand. He can hit you real quick. His hand is strong and heavy and can cause pain to whoever hits it😂.

received_1023042019798376.jpeg

One of the times when I wasn't prepared. I'm trying to comfort and calm him down when he becomes agitated and insists on going home. He was holding my arm and suddenly buried his nails. Though he stopped when I told him no, the marks were already there.
Though he can be sweet sometimes.

IMG_20250809_180600.jpg
We're just waiting for the days that he would be discharged as he was ok when suddenly he was rushed to emergency due to low oxygen and his BP drop. I'm the one looking after him that time. Even called the attention of the staff when I noticed his irregular breathing. We were saddened by how things escalated. Suddenly he was on life support when he was transferred to the ward. The doctor says he can pass away anytime. He got a lung infection and pneumonia. On the 17 of September he succumbed to death at the age of 94. I attended his wake for three days and his funeral last Monday.
Just can't believe how it happened so quickly.
One day he was scolding me for not taking him home and the next day he was gone☹️.



0
0
0.000
15 comments
avatar

That must have been an intense and partly sad experience, but in the end, probably also a release for him and for everyone who had to care for him.

0
0
0.000
avatar

Yes sis. Such a relief to his family. They've been struggling emotionally thinking what they can do to make life easy for him🫤

0
0
0.000
avatar

I'm so sorry for your loss. No doubt when he passed, he was comforted and safe in the knowledge that you obviously cared so much for him.
Sending you my heartfelt best wishes

0
0
0.000
avatar

Thank you🥰. Though most of the time he can't remember. But there's still recognition in his face😐

0
0
0.000
avatar

I prefer to think that memories are not lost, only the ability to recall them.

0
0
0.000
avatar

Sorry to hear sis... Mahirap pero need tanggapin. Siguro, it was his time to rest eternally without pain and suffering...

0
0
0.000
avatar

Uo sis, Kita ko pagod na Rin siya at Ng suffer Lang. Yun lang malungkot Pg may lumilisan🙂

0
0
0.000
avatar

Your story was very inspiring yet full of sadness. I hope he already finds peace with our creator. He was gone but never forgotten in your hearts. He truly lived a beautiful life.💛

0
0
0.000
avatar

Thank you. Yes his in a better place now. No more pain and sufferings🙂

0
0
0.000
avatar

Its hard and painful, but we have to accept po sissy. He is now happy with our Creator po.

0
0
0.000
avatar

Uo sis. Masaya na siya ngayon at Hindi na siya nahihirapan. Thank you♥️

0
0
0.000
avatar

I know how fast things can happen. I also know how sweet you are, and what a comfort you will have been to him. Alzheimer's is horrible and we all suffer when our family members have it.

0
0
0.000
avatar

Thank you, that's why maybe it's more of a relief for them that finally he was laid to rest 😬🫤

0
0
0.000
avatar

Ohhh so sorry, you really did your best in caring for him and it's time to rest, let him rest and stay away from life stress

0
0
0.000