The Cost Of Holding On

A friend of mine came to me really sad today and I didn’t mean to turn her situation into a joke but I couldn’t help it. So the whole reason behind her sadness was letting go of someone. I asked what the person meant to her and she said they were friends.

Knowing her, I knew there was more to it so I made a suspicious facial expression which indicated that I wanted more flesh to the bones she gave me. She then broke the news to me that they almost became partners but they weren’t compatible so they had to let it go. And prior to that, she even found out the person had quite a temper and would insult her, shout at her and do all sorts of harsh things to her when he got angry.

That got me raising my eyebrows and wanting to know why exactly she was crying over losing such a person. She then said she couldn’t let go of the memories. I asked what memories and she said he has always been spending time with her. That actually piqued my interest in what the guy does for a living so I asked and she told me he was unemployed.

From there, I just watched her talk so much about how hurtful it is to be in her shoes. And how all she could see when she closed her eyes were the good times they spent together. I didn’t check my time but I’m sure she spoke for about 20 minutes.

When she was done, I asked her to tell me if she really thinks she deserves to be with someone who makes her cry. If she deserves to be with someone who raises his voice at her or someone who insults her when he’s angry. I also asked her if she thinks this person will continue to spend time with her when he gets a job. Even when he doesn’t have anything, he’s treating you like nothing so imagine he’s now financially okay to do whatever he wants.

I later asked her why she’s been with him unofficially all this while and she said she was hoping he would change. So I told her I never knew she could alter people’s lives and even knelt down in front of her to change my life. That was when we all started laughing. We laughed for about 10 minutes and by the time we finished, she told me herself that she could now see she’s been wasting her time all this while. She also told me she doesn’t even want to be with the person anymore.

I literally leaped for joy upon hearing that statement because I don’t know what I would have done if after all my jokes, she still didn’t get my point. I believe that sometimes, we just allow certain people to do certain things to us in the name of holding on to the good times and memories. We forget that we would need to be mentally healthy to be able to enjoy those memories. Because what good are good times when you don’t have your sanity intact?