Friendship With Purpose

One can't know the value of people until we lose them. I read a write-up by a friend where she detailed how much we humans tend to forget to appreciate each other, not until we get to be so sick or don't have the opportunity to do so anymore. And by then, it might just have been so late.

We can't live a lonely life. I think that is just one reason why we have to live and not leave. We are bound to meet new people, get detached from some people, relate with some others, and just briefly get connected with some others, too.

The funniest part of it is that you can’t predict who you will meet and relate with in your life, but you can decide who you want to stay in your life. People will always come and go. It's the bond you create that will determine how much value they have in your existence and how much you also have in theirs.

While I was in my first year in university, I lived with my brother, and it was just like living at home with my family. There was just a little connection with other people. I already gotten myself to relate better with him. And so our lifestyle was cool.

He graduated while I was in my second year. And now it’s time to live with someone I don't know. It’s time to practice relationships with a stranger. The scary part of it was the thought of not knowing the kind of person I want to meet. Would he be someone who can adapt and relate better to me? Or someone who will just pretend to be fine, and I will also have to live in pretense, too.

All of those thoughts sank deep into my brain. Till it was time to make a decision. I got someone to live with. He was a friendly person from our first discussion on the call. I had that confidence that there won't be much to change about him.

I felt connected with him, and I never knew he felt the same until after a long time, when he confessed to me. We started living together as roommates. He is not the cleanest type of person. I can say he is a bookworm, so he has little time for himself. The first thing on my mind was how to relate to that part of him.

There are times when he gets things wasted. His foodstuffs, clothes, and an untidy environment around him. The only thing he cared for so much was his books. I wondered what kind of person could keep living in such a manner. But he was so cool with them.

I didn’t give him a hard time. But I wasn't comfortable seeing all of those things like that. Our room almost got a boundary, my part always clean and intact, even though I don't have much. With the little I have, I make sure I maintain order with them. Compared to my roommate, who has everything scattered all around.

The difference became so obvious. Then one day, I took it up on myself. I need to make him realize the essence of tidiness without affecting his studies.

We started with his wardrobe, cleared out most of the clothes he doesn’t wear or has used up, and left those that he uses regularly. Then, onto his foodstuffs, I suggested he get more of packaged foods like spaghetti, noodles, flakes, instead of stable foods like yams, rice, and beans that would take him more time to prepare.

I never knew the impact of what I did until we were out of school. He became so close because we stayed together till our finals.

A few months ago, I went to visit him in his apartment and I was so impressed to see how much he has changed in his minimalist lifestyle. He now has everything intact and tidy. He realized I was surprised, then he acknowledged the fact that our friendship had changed a lot in his lifestyle.

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